Warfare

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. 1 Peter 2:9

I am a princess.  I am chosen.  I am wonderfully made.  I am blessed and highly favored.  I am a daughter to the Maker of the Universe!  Praise YHWH!

Satan has a counterfeit identify for me, however.  After recently reading the book Birth Assignments by Kathleen Steele Tolleson, I discovered my counterfeit identify.  I also realized that I had been in agreement with it!  Though Nanette means “grace” and grace means “elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion or action; fluidity,” Satan had contrary plans for me with an entirely different identify. Of course! How did I not see this? I had accepted the bondage of the following adjectives:  awkwardness, clumsiness, klutziness, and stiffness.

After I read that book, I did a quick survey of my life. I was shocked. My recount had the following:  three car accidents (resulting in three degenerated vertebral discs), a sprained ankle, torn ligaments in that same ankle, two broken toes, a broken right pinky finger, a dislocated left thumb, a dislocated left middle finger, a dislocated right middle finger, a broken left ring finger, a right torn rotator cuff, and more than a multitude of scrapes and bruises for bumping into things and tripping over “air”. I am an artist.  He was after my hands!  I am an encourager.  He was after my body so I would focus on myself rather than others.

The enemy hates me because I am a believer in Yahshua the Messiah, Jesus. He had succeeded in lying to me about who I was.  I had bought the lie — hook, line and sinker —  that I was a klutz and a “chronic pain sufferer.”  That was my identity.   I was the perfect candidate to be lied to — I was a spiritual wimp.  I did not fast.  I did not know my bible.  I did not pray with authority.  I did not know who I was in Yahshua.  Though I was a born-again believer, I certainly did not know that I had authority to fight in the spirit, or that I could trample on and have power over the enemy and that nothing could hurt me. (Luke 10:19). I mumbled things about the armor of God, but did not truly put it on (Ephesians 6).

So I started fighting, little by little.  I started declaring out loud who I really was according to the scriptures.  I started taking every thought captive.  I started fighting on my knees.  I started fasting regularly to kill a prideful heart.  I started fastening on the belt of truth.  I started putting on the breastplate of righteousness.  I started putting on shoes with the gospel of peace and the helmet of salvation.  Then I started taking the sword of the spirit, which is the word of God.  With the Holy Spirit as my guide, I even had the gall to start rebuking the evil one.  Wow!  When I resisted the devil, he started to flee.  When I drew near to God, he drew near to me.  (James 4:7-8)

I fell a lot.  I got scared.  I got spooked.  I had moments of unbelief.  But scripture says that “though a righteous man falls seven times, he will get up” (Proverbs 24:16).  So I got up.  Sometimes it took a kind husband or believing friend to pray me up, but I did get up.  I licked my wounds.  I took inventory what I learned.  Then I started again.

The above drawings reveal in pictures what I was learning. I have always been a lover, not a fighter.  However, I am learning that I must be both.  I have not “arrived” and have really only begun, but this girl is a warring princess who is a daughter of the King.

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