NOT FOR SALE

20×16 original pastel on sanded paper

It took me a long time to paint this.  I had good intentions.  It was a productive photo shoot by the pool.  I scored on the photo references.  How could I not?  She is beautiful.  But still.  I simply could not.

I cried in her room.  It smelled of her candles.  I washed the sheets, cleaned the carpets, moved the nightstand.  But her essence was still there.  I shut the door to her room upstairs and left it alone.

This bird had flown the coop.  Part of my nest was empty.  She had flown across the Atlantic and began speaking a foreign language.  I could hear her on the phone sometimes.  I could hear her speaking to her new brother in a language I did not understand.  She was gone.

So I tried again later.  It was painful.  As layers developed, I prayed, reminisced, smiled, then prayed some more.  I could not do her justice.  I could not contain her.

She is the type that will fly.  She will fly far.  She will fly fast.  She will fly gracefully. But, just for a moment, I have a few seconds of her.  Her hair floats on the top of the sparkling water.  And she is beautiful.